Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter
Everything you could possibly, realistically, want a movie with such a title to be. Ridiculous on a metaphysical level. If 'high art' is located over *here*, then this movie is located on the other side of the big bang. There is a period of about 15-20 minutes extending from about 55% through the movie to about 70% through the movie that gets a bit slow. Other than that, it is quite entertaining. Of course, I am dumber for having watched this. Much dumber. And there is no possible way to assign a rating to a movie like this.