As Wes said earlier, if you can’t have special wine on a special day like your wedding, when can you? Keep in mind this is your day and you should do what you want to make it special and memorable. For those who consider it “rude”, maybe their guestlist are winos (not my favorite term, but it works). Believe me, your guests will or should understand.
If you’re still put off by the possibility of offending someone, do what my wife and I did. Make wine your theme and name the tables by different varietals. You can sit some family members at the better wine tables you have and put a bottle of that grape or meritage and they can drink it as they like. Encourage them to travel around and try different wines during the night and save what you want for your head table. I would have loved to have my head table be different types of Zin, but we rested with Champagne.
This way you can 1) seat your family/friends at the bottles you want them to drink, 2) expose people to different wines they might not try otherwise, and 3) keep the social lubrication flowing at all times. While I fell people should be responsible for themselves, I also provided a shuttle to their hotel. I would like people to have a good time if they want to.